So, let's journey for a moment, shall we?  Welcome to a day in the life of meeeee!  I cry, get down and depressed, worry about the state of my life and why isn't as great as it should be (when in reality it is super duper great).  Then I pray, read GOD's word, cry some more, think...hear GOD's word through church or through other people, cry some more and ususally come out swinging.

So, everybody get to ducking, cause Poetri is swinging.  And I am swinging hard.  I am ready to knock this eating thing out the park.  And in case you didn't know, I am an incredible knocker out of the parker  type of guy.  Most times, I don't swing hard, but from now on, I am swinging.  Thanks so much for the words and encouragement that I got from folks on myspace and Poetri.com that read my journal.  YAY.  Even though, I knew that I wasn't alone, now I know for sure that I am not. 

So, GOD hooked a brother up, once again.  HE never fails.  Isn't that crazy?  The righteous shall not be forsaken.  When HE sees one of HIS children down and out, HE comes and rescues them.  Halleluyah.  Now, I am not saying that I am out of the gutter.  I am still fat.  However, I have the tools already inside of me to beat this thing.  They have been there all the time, but a lot of times, I just need to be reminded.  Amen?  Amen.  Oh, sooky sooky now, don't lemme go to church up in here.  Cause we can go to church.  Lord, knows, I need to go to church not only on Sunday, but Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday through Saturday...and of course, twice on Sunday.  

Anyhoo, I slipped in a CD of an old sermon that my Pastor spoke on my way into the city.  Did it touch me?  I mean, did the Pastor basically come out of the speakers and tap me on the shoulder and tell me that I better be listening to this?  YES INDEEDY!!!  He slapped me so hard with the Word, that I had to come and tell you about it.  I played my wife in TROUBLE three times and lost three times, but still had to come and tell you about the new hotness which is the oldest hotness, just forgotten hotness.  Whew!  How can I forget the hotness?  I am equipped to overcome this.  I can do ALLLLLLL things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me.  What am I crying about?  I can do this.  I need to stop my stinking thinking and get on the positive train and start speaking out.  I need to start saying aloud that I can do this.  I need to change my attitude and  my mind about this.  I am walking around saying that I can't do it...and when you say that looooong enough, by golly, you start to believe that.  But, guess what?  I can do it.  I can do ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL things.  Not some things...not most things...but ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL things.  Glory to GOD. 

So, today...I am on a mission from GOD to prove myself right.  That I can do this.  I don't have to eat the whole world every single day.  And trust me, I act like if I don't eat up everything on this day, it will not be here tomorrow.  While I am eating this meal, I am thinking about my next meal.  And this is crazy.  That is alllllll about to stop.  And on top of that, my meals are going back to that healthy eating that I have been doing on occasion the past two years.  I can do it.  I have been doing it.  It just hasn't been for long periods of time.  But, now, it is about to be for the rest of my time.  Cause I still have some work to do here on earth, so my time is not gonna stop until I get things done.  And that means I need to be healthy, wealthy and wise.  I am already wise.  Now, I just got to get the healthy and the wealthy down right. 

So, folks, I am changing my attitude.  I can.  I feel like I am OBAMA's running mate.  I can.  I can.  I can.  If he can win the presidency being a black man in America...doggonnit, I sure as hec can eat healthy.  HAHAHAHA.  Hallelujah.  Thank you, Jesus. 

But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

Keep it natural.

hi, poetri: haven't been here for a while so i didn't know there was a battle raging between you and plumpness. i am a fellow chubbette so your experience has been mine, too.
here's something that i've found helps: be calm. when you don't focus so much on keeping yourself from eating, the urge isn't quite as strong. this happens a lot. deliberate deprivation makes the thing you're trying to get away from that much more enticing and powerful.
you'll get there. take a deep breath and go outside for a quick walk. if thoughts of food come to mind, don't force them away. instead, take note of the things around you; the trees, the grass, chirping crickets, the birds overhead that are pooping on your neighbor's car. there is beauty in your life that goes unnoticed when something as basic as the need for sustenance presents itself in the form of a problem you won't be allowed to ignore.
one more thing: don't think in terms of numbers. pounds lost, calories counted, number of days you've gone without snuggling up to a bucket from the colonel's. live gently. these things take time. when you stop fighting the food, it will stop fighting you. battle won through passive resistance.
all will be well. you'll be in my thoughts.
peaceful heart,
blackrose

Youa re the best...yay!